Donny & Marie Cruise
(NOTE: If you are only interested in my evaluation of the Donny & Marie events and the cruise line, skip down to HERE)
INTRODUCTION
My girlfriend Jane approached me last September about the Donny & Marie Cruise. She’s always wanted to see them in Vegas and we hadn’t had the chance yet (even though we go to Vegas everytime we go out to Utah to visit my parents). So she thought this was a great opportunity. We booked the cruise and our airfare not knowing exactly what to expect (the itinerary didn’t really clue you in).
I’m not a huge Donny & Marie fan. They’re a little bit country and rock n‘ roll… I’m a little bit head banger (KISS, Motely Crue, etc.). Also I grew up in Orem, Utah… the sister city to Provo where the Osmonds grew up and so to us they were just the local celebrities. When I was older and bought my first house it was just 2 blocks south of Osmond Lane (Dover Drive) in Provo. I always wondered if any Osmonds still lived on the lane? There’s also Redford drive right next to it, but I don’t think Robert lives there. At any rate I had seen Donny & Marie perform at various 4th of July events in the BYU football stadium (wonder if Donny remembers being suspended in the helicopter when Bob Hope MC’d?) and seeing Marie at softball games (not sure if that was husband #2?).
But I knew Jane really wanted to do this and I personally love cruising (mostly for the days at sea where I can curl up with a book on the top deck). It was also my birthday week, so we were excited.
DAY 0 – FT. LAUDERDALE (photos)
As with any cruise, it’s a good idea to fly out the day before. So we decided to spend the night in Ft. Lauderdale at the Hyatt Regency Pier Sixty-Six just minutes away from Port Everglades where the cruise ship was to leave the next day.
When Jane booked the room we just thought we were booking a normal hotel room. Wow… were we surprised when we walked into a suite with a lobby… yes a lobby… a kitchen, a dining room, a living room, huge bedroom, and 2 bathrooms! Unbelievable. And as we talked to other people we found out we got this suite for 25% less than they paid for 1 room. Nice!
We went to a fantastic birthday dinner at the Pier 66 Grill and Jane surprised me with a birthday cake. We then went walking along the pier and came across Steven Speilberg’s Yacht worth $220 million. We learned you could rent it for $1.6 million a week.
DAY 1 – BOARDING THE SHIP (photos)
The next morning we swam in the beautiful pool and waited until we could head over to the port and start boarding the ship.
Once at the port, things got a little bit confusing — and I’ve been on 4 other cruises. I’ll say this up front. MSC is by far the worst cruise line I’ve sailed on, with NCL (Norwegian) being the best. I’ll comment more later on what went wrong with MSC (which had very little to do with Donny and Marie).
We managed to get boarded, go to our room, find registration for the Donny and Marie events. They gave a lanyard with a pass that said either GUEST, VIP, or STAFF. On the reverse side they all seemed identical. This becomes very important later when I discuss one of the main problems with the way the D&M events were handled.
We then explored the ship and accidentally stumbled into the theatre where Marie was rehearsing (and quickly got kicked out). Pretty soon it was time for the lifeboat drill that everyone must attend before leaving dock. This was utter chaos is all I can say. We showed up at the scheduled time of 5:15p with our life vests and sat for an entire half hour waiting. When they did show up they proceeded to do the drill in 5 different languages which basically multiplied the time by 5. By the time we finished we had 5 minutes to get back and get ready for dinner. I have never experienced this chaos on any other cruise line.
MSC dinner’s were a disappointment. The presentation was non-existent and it also was becoming clear that no one spoke english very well (it’s an Italian cruise line with Indonesian employees). Lots of mistakes made and the food really wasn’t up to the caliber I’ve had on other cruise lines.
That night was a Q&A session with Donny and Marie. Our first event. Donny came down the isle right next to where we were seated. Pretty cool. Then Marie came on stage. They then proceeded to answer questions from the audience. The only problem with this is right before the cruise they had asked us all to email questions to them. None of those questions were used. Instead we got crazed fanatics who told Donny that they owed them this or that he promised them that. It was really embarrassing. I walked away from the event somewhat disheartened.
By the way… here are my two questions I submitted and still would love to hear the answers to:
- Hi Donny. I use to live in Provo, Utah just 2 blocks south of Osmond Lane. I heard you once lived just north of there in the house on the hill. I got to walk through it once when it was up for sale. What was with all the jacuzzis and the bar? Definitely seemed like a bachelor pad. LOL!
- Hi Donny. I know you are an electronics tinkerer. I heard that you are the one that actually invented the wireless microphone? I think I remember being one of the first people to use one on the Donny & Marie show. Is that true?
That night we got back to the room and realized we had 1.5 pillows (one was a baby pillow). We called 99 (the reception desk) and immediately it would say push 5 to get a callback. We did this and would get a callback with no one on the other end. This continued several times. Finally we got through to someone and asked for 3 REAL pillows. An hour passed and nothing. We called again. Same sequence… 99… 5… wait… no one on the other end… repeat… repeat… finally someone. “Can we get our pillows?”. “They’ll be right there!”. Another hour later… we did the same thing. Finally at 1AM I went down to reception and informed them I was going to stand right there until I got our pillows. I sat there for 15 minutes and finally she said they were headed up to our room. 15 minutes later he arrived with 3 of the worst excuses for pillows, but they were sufficient. Another MSC fail.
DAY 2 – NASSAU (photos)
I had been to Nassau 20 years ago. It had been with my first wife and all she liked to do was shop. So I wasn’t too thrilled with the prospect of going there again. Especially since we hadn’t booked any excursion because the D&M people hadn’t bothered to give us an itinerary up front. We only knew what we were doing when they left the program in our room each night for the next day. So we didn’t have anything planned for Nassau.
However… while staying in Ft. Lauderdale we talked to a couple at the pool who had just come back from Nassau. They told us we should rent a scooter and drive half the length of the island down the Jaws Beach (where the movie was filmed as well as the Flipper TV show). I had a little trepidation about doing this as I don’t think I had been on a scooter since my brother’s mo-ped in our teens. But we did it. Once we got out of the city and got the hang of driving on the left side of the road it was a blast. After only one wrong turn the entire time we arrived at Jaws Beach. Check out the photos to see how beautiful it was. There were Manta Rays in the water and it was so blue.
Unfortunately Jane had an accident here. One of the pier planks had broken and she tripped on it and landed on her knee and elbow. It proved to hinder some of her activity the rest of the trip. And when we got back to the boat and called for ice, 3 hours later nothing still had arrived so Jane used various items from the mini bar to keep it iced. Friggin’ MSC.
So Nassau was AWESOME and we got to do something we hadn’t done before… scootering. We also had a great lunch down by the Fish Fry restaurant and had a fish stew consisting of Snapper, Grouper, and Conch. Yum! Plus they had a Calypso band playing. Lots of fun. It was just unfortunate Jane got hurt.
When we got back to the ship Jane went to Marie’s talk while I took the opportunity to take a dip in the pool. When Jane came back she went on and on about her new admiration for Marie. She said it was a very emotional talk and she related to so many of the things Marie talked about. So thanks Marie for helping so many women.
That night Jane was really excited. It was the sock hop. Well, that’s what the paperwork said. It really turned out to be a 70s TV themed costume contest. So the poodle skirt Jane had gone out to buy, thinking this was a good ole’ fashioned sock hop where we would be dancing, suddenly had to become a Laverne and Shirley Poodle Skirt as Marie would later put it (same for the other 6 or 7 women who showed up in the same thing, thinking that’s what a sock hop meant). So now that it was a costume contest and there wasn’t really any dancing (whew… I was relieved) Jane decided to go up on stage and have her costume judged. I cheered for her… even though no one else did. But she got to meet Marie and be up on stage with Donny, even if it was just for a moment. Pretty cool! I think the kid in the young Donny costume was the winner. Marie and her husband dressed up as Farrah and Lee Major while Donny and his bandmates dressed up as the Village People and did YMCA.
When we go back to our room we watch a NCL ship come in drop someone off and take back off. We assumed a heart attack or something. Shortly after that another NCL ship came in with party horns blaring. A little more exciting than the viewing of “Inception” taking place up on our pool deck!
The days at sea are my favorite. I took my copy of “Walk In The Woods” paperback by Bill Bryson and headed up to the top deck. Jane wasn’t feeling well, but decided to go to the gym and work out (she’s way better about this than I am). Plus she had picked up on a comment Donny had made earlier about being in the gym on Thursday to train some women who had won a workout with Donny. So she wondered if he might show.
As she was finishing her routine Donny came in with the women. I was thumbing through my paperback when Jane came running up ecstatic. “Where’s the camera? I don’t have my camera and Donny is in the gym!”. I handed her the camera from my pack. She asked me to go, but I was really enjoying the sun and the good book and I really wanted her to experience this. So I encouraged her to go back and see if she could get a picture. So she did, and Donny was gracious enough to take a photo with her.
One comment here… Donny and Marie made themselves pretty accessible to the public, though they always had body guards around them. I personally never spotted them on the ship or islands, but Jane saw them various times. Probably because I was always looking for places to be away from the crowds and Jane was always out doing something. Donny and Marie were unconditionally polite, even if the fans sometimes weren’t very courteous… for example the guy who squeezed Marie’s butt when he hugged her. I don’t quite understand this ENTITLEMENT that fans (or fanatics as Jane eloquently put it) feel. One women showed up at every event in the first row and continually took up time to ask Donny some crazy question. Again, a little disheartening… but I commend Donny and Marie for handling it so graciously. They are really sweet people and don’t act like “hollywood” type stars.
That night was the concert we had all waited for. This was definitely the highlight of the cruise. They performed a lot of classics and their broadway stuff. I have to say… Donny’s vocals were spot on. And the band was fantastic. The keyboardist was really really good. After that event we felt pretty good about the experience and were glad we had made the trip, even if some things up to that point had not gone completely smooth.
Before heading over to CocoCay we went to the donny.com event. This was mainly a venue for Donny’s Make A Difference Foundation, but he intermixed it with some musical numbers. He did YoYo (not something I was familiar with — not being a Donny fan) and danced unbelievably. This guy is fit! We left that event early, knowing that all the tenders (little boats over to the island) would get crowded once it was over. We heard later that Donny came over on the public tender along with everyone else. That tells you how accessible he made himself. I don’t think many stars would do that.
CocoCay was just beautiful. Again… we found a nice secluded cabana and I whipped out my book while Jane went exploring. She again saw Donny over in the lunch area. She came back and encouraged me to take a walk a ways down the beach to the nature trail. It was really beautiful. Jane almost stepped on a string ray. It was within 5 feet of her when we noticed it. Yikes!
For that evening’s dinner Jane again surprised me and had the waiters sing Happy Birthday and brought out a cake for our dinner. That was really sweet. Thanks Jane!
It was then time for our final event. The talent show where Donny and Marie were like American Idol judges. It was a really good event. I’m assuming Donny and Marie did not intend for it to end like it did. I won’t go into any more detail than that. Let’s just say Donny and Marie were both on the floor laughing when the event was over and the curtain had to come down. I imagine they wanted to do more as far as let us know where we could leave feedback about the cruise, etc. Kind of a strange ending, but it just went to show how human they are and how comfortable they felt around all there fans. It was like we were one big family just joking with each other. I suspect from Donny’s comments about the video montage that he wasn’t impressed with MSC and that they had been questioning the MSC choice as well. I hope so.
You might get the impression from all my complaining that this cruise was unenjoyable. Quite the contrary. We had a fantastic time. My purpose for doing this lengthy prose is to hopefully help Donny and Marie out with next year’s cruise. I am by no means alone here. I heard these sentiments from many others. So here’s my opinion of things that could be fixed to make the cruise more enjoyable next year. I’m splitting out the MSC comments from the DONNY AND MARIE ones because the MSC failures had nothing to do with them.
DONNY AND MARIE
As I said above. Donny and Marie are true professionals and the most gracious stars I have ever seen. Even when the fans were inconsiderate they were sweet and brushed them off nicely (although the guy who squeezed Marie’s butt should have been banned from all future events — and possibly dumped overboard). When the woman needed help getting through her Make A Difference speech because her hands were shaking so bad, Donny came over and held her papers for her. How sweet. Both Jane and I have a new admiration for both of them.
Here’s a few suggestions for next years cruise:
- Ditch MSC. Worst cruise line I have ever been on. I heard others say this as well. Take a look at NCL. Their staff is well trained, speak english, and are considerate.
- Take over the entire cruise. This split cruise was both disruptive to the non D&M’ers as well as the fans. It was almost like 2 cruises were going on at the same time. If you took over the entire ship and scaled back some of the activities I think people would be happy with 2 shows to choose from per night. It would also prevent the problem of non pass holders trying to get into events they shouldn’t have been at. I felt bad for the “other” entertainers on board who only got half an audience.
- Fix your badges. I heard stories of people misusing the badges. Either slipping into the VIP line or sending a pass back out with someone to get a non-pass holder back in. Maybe a bar code and scanner. If you go with taking over the entire cruise then allow each person to attend only once per night.
- Itinerary MUST be available at the time of registration. I had no idea what we were buying and was unable to schedule any excursions because we didn’t know until the night before what was going on. FIX THIS PLEASE. And don’t taunt us with the fact that you have the entire schedule but don’t want to share it. That’s just mean Greg.
- Make the itinerary clearer. A good example is the sock hop. Do you know why there were so many poodle skirts? Because I think people thought this was a sock hop. No where did I see any information that this was a 70s TV themed costume contest. (UPDATE: someone sent me a link that showed that this was specified as a 70s themed event — but I still contend the description did not match what actually occurred)
MSC CRUISE LINE
- As I said… MSC is the worst cruise line I have ever been on.
- The tips are included in price so there is no reason to give good service. Literally no one was friendly or considerate. I waited 45 minutes for something to drink one night. Another waitress said something to the effect of “LET ME FINISH” when someone at the buffet asked her something.
- Huge language barrier. Even asking for a P-L-A-T-E became a chore.
- Life boat drill was a joke. Started 30 minutes late and went right up until our 6p dinner seating. Doing it in 5 different languages was completely ridiculous.
- We never did know who our cabin steward was. I’ve never had this happen before. On NCL our steward always showed up when we returned and asked how dinner or our excursion was. I never saw ours on this trip.
- They washed the side of boat while we are sitting on tenders. I don’t think that was just water coming down.
- Calling the reception desk was a process in insanity. Those who hit 99 then 5 and then waited know what I’m talking about. Worst customer service ever.
Thanks to Donny and Marie for a wonderful cruise. Yes, there were hitches, but that’s to be expected on the first outing. Please listen to your fans and fix this for the next time. Jane wants to go again. I told her if it’s on MSC I will not go. Now… if it’s the KISS cruise… well… I’ll overlook that! 
Take care!
Global Warming?
Whether global warming is or isn’t happening isn’t something I stress about. It might really be happening. It might not. It seems we spend an awful lot of time and energy worrying about things we have very little control over. Has man made an impact on the planet? Sure. Both good and bad. But when you look at the 5 billion year history of the earth, we are but a speck in that timeline. The dinosaurs were here for 165 million years. We’ve been here 200,000 years. That means the dinosaurs were here 825 times longer than we have been. I’m guessing they made a bigger impact on this planet than we ever will. That also means that humans have only been on this planet for .004 percent of it’s existence. Think about that. If my calculations are correct, that’s 20 minutes if we scaled the earth’s existence down to 1 year. Think about anything you’ve done that lasted 20 minutes (ya, I know where your mind is going on that one). How much of an impact did it make on the earth? Possibly another human being was spawned because of it. Ok, I’ll give ya that. 1 more person out of the 7 billion on this planet. The point I’m trying to make is how insignificant our time on this planet has been. Read the Bill Bryson book “A Short History of Nearly Everything” and you’ll come to a greater appreciation for that.
So back to global warming. Wouldn’t the earth have gone through this cycle anyway? It’s obliterated life on the planet several times in it’s existence. Why would our generation be any different? We will cease to exist at some point in time and the next iteration will crawl out of the swamps. I don’t consider this a defeatest attitude, just realistic. We would be naive to think we’ll be around for ever. This certainly doesn’t give us the right to abuse the planet, but then again, ultimately it probably really doesn’t matter that much. The next species will dig up our bones and wonder what we were like and why we became extinct.
As human beings we have a tendency to not see the bigger picture and put things in perspective. This is especially true when you are emotional invested in something. But if we stand back and realize our insignifigance in the whole process I think we would be humbled. Enjoy the planet, treat each other nicely, and relax and enjoy the ride. And if it gets toasty outside, be glad we were ingenious enough to invent air-conditioning. How cool is that???
I Must Be Oblivious
I will admit it. I don’t know Casey Anthony from Anthony Weiner. I didn’t follow the trial nor do I know anything other than she was a woman accused of killing her child. Every time a news story came on about her I changed the channel. Years ago I was gripped by the OJ trial. I couldn’t get enough and tuned in for every little bit of info. This time I hadn’t even heard of the case until just a few weeks ago. Why was I so oblivious/disinterested this time around? I hardly doubt it had to do with the lack of media coverage. I think it was more about my lack of need to consume what the media was offering. I’m sure this was probably a bigger circus than OJ, but I just didn’t buy a ticket. Why? I think this has a lot to do with my experiences with the court system during my divorce trial and my opinion that court cases should be private.
Who decided this is entertainment? When did the court system become a reality TV show? Why should I support this poor family being drug through the media gutter? Why give the lawyers the limelight they so desperately crave? It’s a scary future. Movies like “The Running Man” may not be that far away. I need to know what’s going on in government and I need an unbiased news report. I don’t need to know what’s going on in everyone’s personal life (well… except for what people want to expose on Facebook). I find that if I concentrate on what I am doing and not what everyone else is doing, life gets a whole lot easier and a lot less stressful.
Sometimes I still get sucked up by the media and it pisses me off. I have to snap myself out of it and take a nice long walk through nature. It’s so easy to get caught up in the sensationalism. I’m not trying to be preachy, just trying to understand why my perspectives have changed. If you ever experience the court systems, perhaps your views will change as well. Lawyers for the most part are not interested in coming to a speedy resolution. They certainly aren’t sympathetic or vested in their client’s emotions. Most have learned to detach. The media doesn’t seem too concerned with a person’s emotions or privacy either. Just watch Nancy Grace for more than 5 minutes, if you can swallow it, for proof of that (I’m sure she doesn’t have any demons in her closet).
So maybe the trial wasn’t fair or maybe the verdict wasn’t just. I have absolutely no idea. I also don’t care. It’s a private matter.
Happy New Year
A lot of people are proclaiming “good riddance” to 2010 with the hopes that 2011 is a better year. I realize the economy has sucked for many and that people are out of jobs, but I really hate to see this negative attitude. Will 2011 be any better without an attitude change? Isn’t life what we make it? Haven’t people been overspending and living beyond their means for years? Shouldn’t we be prepared to self sustain if there is a crisis?
For me, 2010 was a great year. I’ve learned so much on my job. I’ve had time to pursue my iPhone hobby and make enough to not only pay for the necessary equipment, but to also supplement my income. There are lots of opportunities out there if we are willing to reinvent ourselves and stop complaining about the government or how we might have been screwed over by a company, a spouse, or whatever. I like to think I’m a pretty tolerant person, but I have a hard time finding tolerance for people who complain without “acting”. We live in a country where you have that option. Find something you are good at and do it. The mighty dollar should not be the end goal. Happiness and healthiness should be.
I took a hike through the woods yesterday with my girlfriend. Something we haven’t done for quite a while. But it was exactly the thing we needed to start the new year. We got to talk, share a lot of feelings, see some awesome birds, listen to the running water, and just enjoy a little intimacy. I took these hikes daily during my divorce, and it’s what kept me sane. I need to get back to this. So if I have one New Year’s resolution, it’s to get out into nature more.
White House Visit Snafu
This past Saturday while visiting DC we had a confirmed reservation to tour the White House. The plans were made in advance and we had the confirmation number. Our scheduled tour time was 8:30am. We showed up around 7:45a (cuz I’m just anal that way). We got up to the podium (ya, seriously… that’s all they have… no gate, desk, computer, etc.). The girl looks through the hard-copy list (it might have even been printed on a dot-matrix printer) and our names aren’t on it. She checks our IDs and calls a guy over (he couldn’t have been over 23 years old — I’m gonna call him Skippy). Skippy proceeds to make a cell-phone call with our IDs and confirmation number in hand. He goes over to a bird-bath (I’m serious) and sets all the stuff down on his little workstation the government has so graciously provided for both him and the pigeons! He comes back to us and hands us back our IDs and tells us he’s awaiting an email… yes, an email on his blackberry, cuz they ain’t got a computer anywhere in site… and Lord knows how secure sending our social security numbers over 3g is.
In the meantime, more 8:30 people show up (we were the first — did I mention I’m anal?). More missing names. The girl is really starting to get panicky. So they start making a little corral for us to “graze” in while we wait. Soon the corral is full of 8:30 attendees. A security guard shows up on his Schwinn, also a little panicked that some of us are outside the corral. He instructs us all to back up while they extend the size of the corral. By this time, all 8:30 tour people are directed to the corral, whether they are on the list or not. I can see they suspect a terrorist plot. Some “Jihad Joe” infiltrated the computer system, sabotaged the 8:30 list, in hopes that they’d just let us all go through. But haha… they are smarter than that. Instead, Skippy is going to take each of our IDs individually and process us 1 by 1. Shouldn’t take more than say… SEVERAL HOURS.
Lucky for us… we were already being processed by the finely tuned line-processing team. Our names were called moments later and we were able to proceed. We mosey up to security gate #2. Showed our IDs. Oh crap… were not on the list. I say “Ummmm… we are part of the mixed up 8:30 list”. The guys walks over and finds the sheet over paper with our 3 names on it. Whew! We’re in by 9:00a.
What happened to the rest of the 8:30 group? We ran into one of them later at the White House visitors center. They were all asked to come back in a few hours. Not sure if any of them got to take the tour or not. We were lucky! The whole time I had to hold in my laughter. It was true poetry in motion. The epitome of our government at work. It would truly make a hilarious scene in a movie. Adam Sandler… feel free to steal this for your “Happy Gilmore: President Elect” movie.
What would have topped this all off? Jay was SO EXHAUSTED from standing he almost sat down on a 200 year old chair in the Red Room. OMG that would have been hilarious if it would have shattered. Luckily I caught him in mid-squat, even before the Secret Service did.
Want to see more of our trip? (BTW… no cameras allowed at the White House, so we didn’t get any pics)
Day 1: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=260050&id=705579767&l=c956220bbe
Day 2: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=260054&id=705579767&l=adb4b6c7f7
Day 3: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=260059&id=705579767&l=6bb51e60b2
Is Texting Harmful?
I’ve been thinking a lot about this topic lately. I’ve observed kids (and adults) that are SO attached to their devices that they kind of lose site of the reality around them. I know I’ve experience this with my iPad. Is that a bad thing? The person IS interacting with someone (or something), just through a different medium. But that’s different than eye-to-eye interaction. It’s hard to build intimacy through a text message isn’t it? Plus isn’t it rude to be with someone else and dividing your attention between them and your offline conversation? I’ve been at family gatherings where the kids are so busy texting that they aren’t interacting with each other. That’s sad from the way I remember being raised and having so much fun with my cousins, etc. I try to never respond to my phone during dinner, a movie, or time with family.
For me text messaging is great because it allows me and my girlfriend to interact throughout the day without interfering with each others schedules. She can text me back when she’s not busy with a student and if I’m busy in a “train of thought” at work I can ignore the text for a little bit and respond later. It’s not a distraction for us because we limit the interruptions to maybe a dozen or so a day. But what happens to your brain when you are constantly texting and feel the need to immediately respond? Is your brain rewired to always respond to the stimuli and you feel the impulse to do something about it? How does this affect your real-world interactions? Plus… what about all the time lost? I know that after I’ve spent too much (unproductive) time on the computer or my iPad (playing “We Rule”) I feel kind of depressed. Like… wow… I just wasted all that time and I could have been hiking, playing guitar, or working in the yard.
Then again, some may question if it’s a waste of time. Is FaceBook a waste of time? Isn’t it a good tool for interacting with someone? Or is it just NOISE that we otherwise wouldn’t be “wrapped up” in? I know I’ve spent many hours typing responses to messages that ultimately I really don’t care about and I probably wouldn’t have interacted with this person anyway. In fact I recently “pruned” my FaceBook list to prevent just this kind of wasted time.
So… give me your thoughts. I want to hear from those of us that grew up in the generation where we played outside and some dirt and a stick was sufficient entertainment to those who need constant entertainment and stimuli. Of course, I don’t want you wasting too much time. So make it quick!
Global Warming… It’s A Crock
I’ve been thinking about this for a while and wanted to write something about it. Why? Because I’m convince there is no such thing as global warming, and… if there is… there’s really nothing we can do about it. After reading (listening) to Bill Bryson’s book “A Short History of Nearly Everything“, I’m convinced the Earth is doing what is has always done. Cleansing itself. For us to think we have any control over what’s inevitably going to happen, is ludicrous.
Does this mean I’m not committed to saving resources and doing my part? Absolutely not! I think we all need to do our part to make the world a safe and habitable place to live. But eventually, Mother Nature will take over and we’ll either be frozen into extinction or burned up. Is that pessimistic? No… just realistic. The Earth has wiped out whatever species has been dominant, several times. It will continue to do so, and some other race or being will populate the planet. Now of course, these things happen on huge timescales, that none of us will ever see (unless the meteor extinction scenario happen — but Bruce Willis will save us from that).
So the Earth might slowly be getting warmer or colder, but it’s gonna take thousands (if not millions) or years. The Earth is 4.5 billion years old. Man has only been around, at best, a couple of million years. That’s a speck of time. The dinosaurs were around a lot longer than we have been, but of course, they are gone, as in time, we will be. So.. to whatever species is reading my blog (or whatever you species do), congratulations — enjoy the planet. But don’t get too cocky. It’s only for a short time.
High School 1959 vs. 2009
(Thanks Kim)
Scenario 1
Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck’s gun rack.
1959 – Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2009 – School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario 2
Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
1959 – Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2009 – Police called and SWAT team arrives — they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged them with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario 3
Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.
1959 – Jeffrey sent to the Principal’s office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2009 – Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The school gets extra money from the state because Jeffrey has a disability.
Scenario 4
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1959 – Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.
2009 – Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has an affair with the psychologist.
Scenario 5
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1959 - Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock.
2009 - The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.
Scenario 6
Pedro fails high school English.
1959 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.
2009 - Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario 7
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.
1959 - Ants die.
2009 - ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates his parents – and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny’s dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
Scenario 8
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1959 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2009 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
Applebee’s (There She Blows!)
For Christmas I received a gift certificate for Applebee’s. I hadn’t been there for several years, because the last time we were there we all got “colon blow’ incredibly bad. So… thinking it was just a one time experience, we went back there today. I ordered the appetizer-trio. Within 5 minutes of leaving the restaurant, I had that uncomfortable growling in my lower intestine. I knew I was in trouble… still 10 more minutes to the house. Well, I held off the attack and made it home. Did you ever notice that the urgency of the situation logarithmically increases as the distance to the house decreases? I am now convinced there is something wrong with the food at Applebee’s. A quick search on Google revealed I’m not alone. Read this halarious review:
http://www.yelp.com/biz/applebees-san-diego-3#hrid:BQ3rhTTy33GorReKQkO_cg
Has anyone else experienced this?
Born With Talent
Are you born with talent or do you learn it?
I’ve been watching the progress of my girlfriend’s son. We got him a guitar for Christmas 2 years ago. Up until that point he hadn’t really played a musical instrument, but he showed the desire and always had a creative side to him. He seemed to take naturally to it and each time I see him he has made tremendous progress. He just has the knack to hear the music and reproduce it. He got a drum-set this year (we celebrated last night) and the beats he’s putting down already show an amazing sense of timing.
I think computer programming is an art form as well, just as an artist with a brush, or a musician with his instrument. I’ve met programmers who just have the ability to think logically. As I TA’d in college I watched students who clearly did not have the knack, forcing themselves to take computer classes, not ever really getting “it”. Perhaps they should have found their “born” talent and pursued that.
I believe we are each born with a “gift”, maybe multiple gifts. Having parents and friends who help us recognize those gifts and cultivating them is a godsend. My parents encouraged me to take things apart and see how they worked. They bought me electronic kits, chemistry kits, etc. I made “things” out of everyday “trash”. Thanks Mom and Dad! My Dad is still a “tinkerer”.
I suppose talents can be learned, but I think those born with it excel at it.
